How To Speak Corporate

david-brent

Forget drilling down or reaching out, if you want to leverage your best attributes in today’s corporate world you’ve got to think widescreen. Here’s my list of the ten corporate terms you simply have to slip into a meeting this week. Blue sky thinking is so last century…

10: Deep Dive

If you’re not a deep diver, you’re simply not in the game. Nobody wants a shallow diver do they? It might bruise, for starters.

9: Get Granular

Today’s business is all about the detail. If you want to succeed, you’re going to have to sift through the information and get granular. Capiche?

8: Low-hanging Fruit

Pluck it while it’s ripe, yeah? At least before it donks you on the head.

7: Let’s Walk Up The Strategic Staircase To Get A High-Altitude View

Strategic staircases available at all good homeware stores.

6: Conversate

“Shall we conversate that later?” If you like.

5: Let’s Warm Our Hands On The Information Radiator

If you are the information radiator, this could be very weird indeed.

4: Idea Showers

Jump in, the water’s hot!

3: Take a Belt & Braces Approach

Because you don’t want to be caught with your project trousers down, okay?

2: Don’t Try To Boil The Ocean

A watched ocean never boils.

1: I’m Getting Short Of Runway For This

Delusions of being a plane is the new black in the corporate world. Jump onboard.

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